


The Madness of General Lif

by EriiErii



Category: Fire Emblem Heroes, Fire Emblem Series
Genre: Angst and Feels, Canonical Character Death, Mental Breakdown, Other, Song Parody, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-26
Updated: 2019-11-08
Packaged: 2020-09-26 23:37:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20398039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EriiErii/pseuds/EriiErii
Summary: As the Order of Heroes learn the true identity of one of the generals of the dead, Lif, they learned his true motives behind why he tries to kill them. However, despite knowing he acts in the interest of saving his own world and those he loves, Lif struggles in being unable to bring himself to kill his lover, Kiran. Their feelings are written to the tune of The Lunacy of Duke Venomania.





	1. General of Madness

**Author's Note:**

> Warning, major spoilers for Book III of Fire Emblem Heroes! Proceed with caution!

"...Why did you come here, Kiran... Why couldn't you have abandoned him? Just this once..."  
  
He knew there was no practical point to ask, but he also hated the answer nonetheless. Kiran loved Alfonse. He knew how much Kiran loved the whole Order of Heroes as friends, if not practically treating them and many of the heroes as family. But if Kiran had never been called to their world in the first place, then... surely...

Lif shook his head. It was too late now. No amount of wondering and longing would change the fact that Kiran was here with Alfonse, and their fates were sealed. He crossed blades with them so many times, pretending away his feelings and trying to fool himself into thinking they were nothing more than sheep to slaughter to further his goals.

But... It was almost a cruel twist of fate that, of all the ways Lif's mind corroded by this point, those memories stuck with him. Even after all this, he still found difficulties merely pretending all those bonds never existed.

He left the flowers he gathered by the graves and fled faster than the Order of Heroes could catch him. He knew the deed must be done. Sharena, Anna, Kiran... all of them needed to die. But not now. Not... not yet. Even as Alfonse looked at him with a suspicious gaze, even when he held Kiran close and protectively beside him, he would give them time to dwell on the inevitable. Just a moment more...

Throw away everything to bring a dead world back to life.

Sacrifice another self.

"Come... Let us begin."

* * *

  
Silence in the lands,  
I hear you, slow and sweeping.  
following a plan,  
to help the dead sleep.

He's at your command.  
That prince you were safekeeping.  
Feeling with my hand,  
my heart is weeping...

Shadows of remorse,  
would live and die inside me.  
Lost forevermore,  
killed with insanity.

Cohort of the dead,  
It's my key to salvation.  
To dye your world red,  
to save my nation.

* * *

  
"Hm..."

"What did you find, Alfonse?"

Be it subconscious or coincidence, Lif led them to the general direction of the library. After all these years, so many records remained in place, never to be touched in this empty, cold world by their original denizens. Kiran vaguely kept an ear out for what the other three found, hearing bits and pieces of what happened to this future, dead version of Askr they stepped into.

"As destruction took hold, we joined with Embla to seek the forbidden heart..." As always, Alfonse focused on the task at hand, no matter how grim their surroundings were otherwise. With little choice, Anna and Sharena focused on him likewise, Anna being the most vigilant yet anxious of finding any leads to what could kill that whom rules over the dead.

* * *

  
Fighting a battle he realized he already lost,  
he traded his soul to the very enemy he crossed.  
Surging with power, he felt his body turn to frost,  
Saving his world, but at what cost?

* * *

  
Kiran vaguely heard Alfonse describe a Rite of the Heart, a power that can supposedly overcome even Hel, but whose every pulse would claim a life. As curiosity got the better of Kiran, the summoner pried through books here and there only to find stray notes here and there within some of the pages. Looking at one note, there were two different handwriting styles, with messages from stray footnotes to what looked to be sappy love letters handed between one another. One of the styles looked like Alfonse's, Kiran thought, but the other...

Lif made his presence known in leaping out of the shadows, his sword already drawn. He ignored all the questions aimed at him with his focus landing squarely on Alfonse, whom he singled out up until Kiran stepped between them.

It didn't take much for Kiran to see the pained look cross Lif's face for a brief moment in seeing the summoner and the prince try to defend one another. But the question remained...why?

* * *

  
Striking him down, my rival is found, our fight starts anew  
Please keep at bay, Kiran get out the way, I'm begging of you.  
Before it's too late, I'm changing our fate, this world we'll undo.  
Please forgive me, inside, my heart pleas, if you only knew...

Every life here I break and cut through  
Please know in your heart, that I keep on fighting for you.

* * *

  
They knew too much now. He could barely handle how shocked and sad Sharena looked, but the look on Kiran's face when Alfonse outed him was just as bad, if not worse.

He retreated yet again. If not for still not being able to bring himself to kill Kiran or the others yet, he also had to give his body time to slowly reconstruct after Kiran fired a badge and clipped him at one of his shoulders to protect Alfonse. It was bittersweet to know even in this world, Kiran learned to adapt and weaponize the items the Order of Heroes gathered, particularly the ones they would always store in excess no matter how generous Kiran would be to use them for their intended purpose.

He could hear the Order of Heroes slip away out of Askr's ruins. It gave him time to recollect himself and retreat to what remained of the throne room. He slumped against the throne where many kings since the original Lif up to him have sat. Just next to it, there was a far more neglected, smaller throne who long since lost its luster under the weight of cobwebs and sheets of dust.

He tensed. His hand gripped so tight he just barely caught himself in time not to crush the badge in his gauntlet. Even if it previously pierced his shoulder, it was still precious to him, in a way. At least for the moment.

It was enough the badge existed at all, even if a part of it was now glistening with a coat of neon-blue blood staining it. He swept the long-neglected seat of the throne before letting the badge rest on it. He didn't even care that his blood would defeat the purpose, finding his blood to be part of his offering. He owed Kiran far more of his suffering than just this small sample, anyways.

Would his Kiran ever forgive him? Even if things were fixed again, would his crimes to cause this mess at all make him lose the summoner anyways? And what of _this_ Kiran?

He hung his head low in kneeling to the empty throne of the one whom he would've taken as his co-ruler.

* * *

  
Back in our world,  
you'd rule beside my throne.  
Even when I fell,  
you were young and driven.

Beating heart in hand,  
I thought it secured our win,  
But you were the first,  
to leave me all alone...

As the heart had pulsed,  
I performed the ultimate sin,  
At too great a cost  
to hope to atone.

Whether or not you  
feel that I'm unforgiven,  
I allowed my flesh  
to melt into bone.

* * *

  
"Lif!"

Yet again he crossed paths with the Order of Heroes, this time in Embla. Yet again, he was mocked with the sight of an echo of what used to be. He felt like his tolerance for the sight was slipping every second, and it only served to strengthen his urge to strike his past self dead.

"Lif... Is there really nothing we can do for you?"

But Kiran... He didn't know anymore. Why couldn't he be selfish? Why couldn't he just make this Kiran his? Why couldn't he just take them _all_ for himself as long as he kills Alfonse?

* * *

  
Driven by the laws of this world governing the dead,  
One by one, their lives could be saved if their other selves died instead.  
Turning a sword to his alternate self, whom he misled,  
He turned to Kiran and said:

"You should not have died for everything that I've done.  
You paid for Gustav's utter fallen disgrace of a son.  
I couldn't save anyone of you all while Hel won  
But she promised a way this all could come undone.

Knowing our world could be restored,  
It's a burden I bore, so our love can stay forevermore."

* * *

  
This had to end.

  
Perhaps Alfonse realized this as well. Why else would he try to go out of his way to seek him?

What Lif didn't expect was for Alfonse not only to do so alone, but heavily adorned in regal clothing he felt nostalgic in recognizing they were an honor worn by Askran lords. No matter how hard Alfonse tried to obscure his face, or how differently dressed to hide his field uniform, Lif knew it was him. Did he want to die as a king, then? Gladly. And when he's gone, Lif would take everything in his place. If he could barely keep up with his skills without Kiran, Anna or Sharena to fight by his side, what hope did he have to fight him alone?

_Fool._

* * *

  
And so you've returned,  
our fight should start anew.  
Prince of Askr's past,  
versus General of Blue

You now know the truth,  
so you should understand  
as I draw my sword,  
what I have all planned.

For your death here,  
you dressed in clothes thick and grande,  
You covered your face,  
your death still at hand.

No matter your clothes,  
you'll still die within this land,  
raising up my sword,  
I steel myself and

* * *

  
He stopped in place. It was like he was losing control of his body. He vaguely saw Alfonse draw his weapon with a quick flick of his hand out of his sleeve.

...No... That wasn't Fólkvangr after all.

As he forced himself to look down, he saw his chest was utterly torn to shreds. The damage was severe enough he could see his ribs splintered inwardly all over the place in his chest. He freely leaked his glowing blood all over himself.

Forcing himself to look up, vaguely aware his mouth openly leaked more of his blood through the mask binding his face, he felt like a fog was steadily lifted off him.

Even if Alfonse hadn't dare approach him as he had, it all made sense now...

* * *

  
You came all by yourself, against Sharena's behest.  
You brushed your hand to my face, my cold cheek, you caressed.  
You were more meticulous how you chose your state of dress,  
to hide yourself just before your gun shot badges through my chest.

"_Kiran, please!_" I fall to my knees, "_don't do this to me!_"  
"Please understand, a corpse or a man, I'm setting you free."  
As I fell, my curse would dispel, drowning in blue  
You held me close, it's what I want most, it's like somehow you knew.

Knowing what's wrong, they missed you were gone, you kept them all away,  
In the end, as more than a friend, you couldn't stay away.  
Your heart broke, and I nearly choked, you helped will me to say  
"Thank you... We both know it's better off this way..."

As you let my soul lay to it's final rest,  
I had nearly forgot, that you were always the one who knew best...

I love you...


	2. Forgive Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You tried to keep a promise you’ve made to another me. Now it’s my turn to keep my promise for the sake of the other you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To the tune of I’m Sorry, I’m Sorry from Vocaloid
> 
> Thanks for reading! For post updates, questions, art and general random silliness in between, check me out at eriisaam.tumblr.com for more!

Alf, as you know, I love you…

Even as your form, Lif, know I love you too…

But it seemed once, I failed to help you. 

I’m sorry...

Well, not this time!

I won’t let your sacrifice go in vain this day!

Although you... 

might not approve of how I’ll fix this _ my _ way...

* * *

_ HEEEEL _

Hey _ HEEEEEL _

HIDING ALL THIS TIME TO LAUGH AT THEIR MISERY. (WHAT A BIG FUCKING SURPRISE, AND AWFULLY RICH COMING FROM A BITCH LIKE YOU. WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?)

DANGLING THEIR CORPSES TO ME LIKE THAT, HOW FUCKING DARE YOU!

haha

haha

Haha

Haha

HAHA

**HAHA**

**HAHA**

** _HAAA!_ **

** _By all means go aheaD and gloat and brag of kIlling mE, bitch._ **

** _WHat all the bEtter to shut your brain off Like a stubborn switch._ **

** _I’ll biDe my tImE when you think your plan goes off again without hitch._ **

** _It’s worth the wait to watch your corpse as all you Do Is writhE around and twitch._ **

* * *

Forgive me, Eir.

It seems I worried you a bit too much back there.

Please do not cry,

As Sharena said, everything will be fine.

I get it.

This isn’t the easiest thing for you to have to look at her as she is now.

So please. 

Go back now, and I’ll take care of it.

Forgive me, don’t mind me.

In this new world, this outcome was what’s meant to be.

Now go to sleep. Don’t think too deep.

This awful dream isn’t worth tears to weep.

I failed you then, but I’m here now,

So let me handle this, don’t fight with me of how.

So if you please, Alf, be at ease.

This time will be different, 

I will show you just how much so, starting _ now. _

* * *

HA HAHA, RUN BITCH, RUUUUN! (CHASING YOUR BROKEN FACE DOWN JUST MAKES THIS ALL THE MORE FUUUUN~!)

DON’T THINK I FORGOT WHAT YOU DID TO THRASIR AND LIF! 

IT’S ONLY FAIR IF I MAKE YOUR CORPSE DANCE LIKE THEM, WOULDN’T IT~?

** _What’S wrong, Hel? You can’T curse me now thAt you lack both Your arms and jaw, right?_ **

** _So, how long woulD it take to turn thEm to jelly flesh thAt woulD work right?_ **

** _Was that whY Lif’s lOwer face was the way it was? All cUz of you?_ **

** _Well, hoW about I make The upper half of your head matCH, cuz fuck you!_ **

* * *

Forgive me, Alf. 

It seems I wasn’t quite acting like myself…

Now where were we? Ah, yes, here’s a present to Lif, from me.

Angrboða

Maiden of life and death, I believe that you owe it to us.

Your debt’s paid. Through me, would you kindly strike Hel dead?

Forgive me, (not really).

This was all a fucking long time coming, you see.

Now go to sleep. _ Eternal sleep. _

You’re a dream not even worth the tears to weep.

You killed me then, but I win now.

Without you in power, this future begins anew now.

You saw that, Alf? Oh calm down, please.

Without Hel in this world,

You can show Lif you kept your promise starting now.

* * *

You saw that, Lif..?

Wherever you are now, at least you can rest in peace...

Ditto, Thrasir,

even if I’m sure your hatred against me won’t fully cease.

But hey…

Wherever you two are, maybe your lives will begin anew now.

Oh and Lif? I’m sure the other me still loves you too…

Haaa…

* * *

Forgive me. Alfonse, please…

As rash as I was, I still kept to my vows, you see.

No, Alfonse, please, now be at ease...

I can feel the way you’re buckling at your knees.

Oh, Alfonse, why? Please, Alf, don’t cry.

Ok, maybe I went behind your back, but please, make no mistake,

There’s risks I’ll take, all for your sake,

all to fix a painful mistake.

Alfonse, please, forgive me.

I tried to pay a debt from Other Me.

And now we’re free, so come with me.

Let’s put all this past us like an awful dream.

Lif lost back then, but you’re fine now.

You can take your time, Alf. I’m still here with you now.

Once you’re at ease, hear me out please.

This time will be different,

so together, let’s keep going onward now.


End file.
